Some quotes to tide you over while I get my writing life together:
"Why don't you talk to my Mr. 'I'm giving an exam on the Thursday night before Halloween cuz I'm a stupid jerk and sometimes in class the middle button of my shirt comes unbuttoned...'"
"Someone wrote into the paper saying that banning Four Loko is un-American."
"What?! It's un-retarded! Wait...does that...does that come out right? It's not smart to not ban.... Um. Four Loko is bad!"
"What?! It's un-retarded! Wait...does that...does that come out right? It's not smart to not ban.... Um. Four Loko is bad!"
"That kid is gayer than a guy at a Lady Gaga concert wearing skinny jeans, rainbow suspenders, and Hold Me Closer Tiny Dancer as his ringtone."
"My favorite word is cattywampus. But just the wampus part."
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